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Well, I just received an email from a friend and it was a first class bitch-out.

Background: We used to work together, were roommates for a while, she got married and moved far, far away. I've seen her three times since. She recently moved to Texas and is working on her PhD at UTA. We've spent all summer talking about getting together. I kept putting it off. She finally called me on it and I wrote to her:

I'm sorry I've hurt your feelings with this putting you off thing. I knew you would call me out on it eventually.
When I tell you my reasons for putting you off, you are going to want to reach through the monitor and throttle me.
I'm fat.
Wait, there's more.
The first time I visted you in SLC, you met me at the airport. And there was a split-second expression on your face. I've seen it before. That brief "Oh my God she's gained weight!" look.
And I know that's been years and years ago now, that we've even seen each other a few times since then, but I guess I'm afraid that I might see it again. For even the briefest second.
See, I told you you'd want to throttle me.
I know it doesn't matter and I don't know why I am making such a big deal out of it. Crazy, huh? But I am sure I weigh 20 more pounds than the last time you saw me. Enough for a reaction.
I feel stupid for even writing this, but there you have it.
I know I just have to get over this already and we'll be fine. I'm pretty sure you'll understand where I am coming with this. And that you'll forgive me for it. Right after you smack me in the head.
I know you have your visit to your mom's soon. Let me know when that is and will make a for-sure date.
She wrote me back a really nice email saying that she completely understood, felt the same way about herself, apologized for any past unconscious looks and that she was getting ready to go visit her mom and would call me when she got back. Now, my bad for not writing her back then and thanking her for understanding. I just figured I'd hear from her when she got back. And yes, I've known she's been back for a while and kept meaning to email, but alas I suck sometimes.
 
Here's her response today:
 

Glad to hear your Mom is out of the woods!  That is great news.

 

So… almost another month has passed and I haven’t heard from you, other than the emails about your Mom.  While, it’s great to hear about her, email blasts are not exactly personal communication, much less a get-together. 

 

I’m not sure what to think.  Either you are extremely busy or your last email was complete b.s.  I totally bought the “hard to see someone after so long” self-consciousness thing.  Now I wonder.  I guess I’m mostly trying to understand why you would bother with that line when I gave you an easy out.

 

We’ve known each other a long time—not 30 years, but still…  If you would prefer to let it go, that’s certainly your prerogative.   If not, then you got some ‘splainin to do, my friend. 

 

What’s up? (Or maybe I should say, WTF?)

Yeah, that one didn't hit me as well. I wasn't lying before and I've really been struggling with my depression. It's not the best excuse, but if you've been here, you understand. I honestly don't know what to say to her.

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